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Monday, September 25, 2023

Jollof political satire: President’s technocrats, minister of finance, and parliament


By Servant of Jollof 

What a delightful and entertaining political theatre we have in The Gambia. It is akin to watching a masterfully orchestrated magic show, where the minister of finance, parliament, and the president’s technocrats are the magnificent illusionists, charmingly making our sovereignty disappear and national interests levitate into thin air. Truly, their collective performance is a masterpiece, an art form that leaves the masses spellbound and questioning their very own understanding of democracy and governance.

We, Gambians, must be feeling very blessed to have gifted technocrats, and very patriotic politicians guiding our impoverished nation’s destiny.

I noticed in the wake of the new Gambia, some join-the-list, and ungrateful politicians, some of whom we have successfully retired (I did not mention Halifa Sallah or Seedia Jatta or recently disappeared Madi Jobarteh- Has Lawyer Darboe retired?) continue to worry our well-informed masses and voters about accountability, transparency, democracy and about our country’s future. 

What is little accountability, transparency, democracy, sovereignty loss, and questionable decision-making in the grand scheme of things? Nothing at all, nothing! We should all learn to appreciate the whimsical dance of power and the intricate choreography of political acrobatics.

In his brilliance, the minister of finance managed to mortgage our newly built bridge without uttering a word to the public. Such discretion is rare these days, and we must commend him for keeping the masses blissfully unaware of the financial shenanigans taking place behind the scenes. One can’t help but appreciate his clever maneuverer to bypass parliamentary approval, claiming that it’s not yet required. Why bother with transparency and accountability when you can simply carry on without the tiresome interference of so-called elected representatives?

Parliament: that venerable institution of debate and decision-making- I mean coffee drinking. Kudos to them for being the masters of inaction and selective blindness! Their ability to turn a blind eye to crucial international agreements is a true testament to their creative governance approach. Who needs to meddle with trivial things like national sovereignty when there are more pressing matters like prolonged tea breaks, lavish banquets to attend to, and per diems to chase after like Senegambia bumsters?

To those closer to Mr President, we should be most thankful to them, the president’s esteemed technocrats. They truly are the unsung heroes, whispering sweet nothings into the president’s ear while expertly steering him towards catastrophic decisions that never favor the country or its people.

After all, it takes great skill to advise a leader to overlook parliamentary approval for vital agreements and sweep the consequences under the rug. These advisors are true magicians, capable of turning even the most disastrous decisions into illusions of success. Ever wondered why some of them are former drummers?  

Let us raise our hats to the Minister of Finance, the president’s technocrats, and Parliament. They have shown us that the path to effective governance lies not in transparency or accountability, but in the art of deception and the magic of illusion. Long may they continue to entertain us with their astonishing performances, leaving us all in awe of their political prowess. Bravo. 

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