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The road to finding myself

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There comes a point in your life when you realize what is important and what’s not. This is a time when you let go of all the negative and childish things. A time when you learn to grow up and truly become the person you are meant to be.

In this life, things happen which make you question yourself and those you surround yourself with. Like what kind of person am I? Are the people in my life a negative influence or do they bring out the best in me? These are questions I have asked myself for the past year, questions that have made me realize who and what is truly important. The past year was truly a hard year for me. Certain things happened which did hurt me at that time, but I am now very grateful that it occurred because if it didn’t, I would be living a life in the shadows and never would have truly seen my ways and how it affected those closest to me. Not only was light shed on my path, but also on people around me. I learnt a lot from them and saw things that were never there, things that made me question my life and whether they were the type of people I wanted to be involved with.


The journey was long and hard, but I finally made a decision, one that I can now say feels amazing and has put me in a much better place. There is a saying “once you let the negativity go, everything falls into place”. This is exactly what I feel happened. Familiarizing myself with the teachings of the Qur’an made life even easier. I learned a lot regarding the way we as individuals are meant to live our lives, and how people we surround ourselves with, whether good or bad affect our lives and character.

Not saying I am perfect, but I was going on a wrong path and I thank God for my family and friends who made me realize it. Made a whole lot of changes, which I am beginning to be proud of. Being more frequent with my prayers which I must say is an amazing feeling because God has truly shown and continues to show me what truly matters in this life, and how to let go of the negatives.

One thing I know for sure is that, once you start having a positive mindset, and with God by your side, anything is possible and you will never be led onto the wrong path.


Dear woman,

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I pray that you have a happy life with people that genuinely love and care about you.

Dear woman,

Don’t be afraid to want luxury and work for it. You deserve everything glamorous in this life.

Dear woman,

Please shun away and not romanticize suffering for it tears down every fibre of your soul. There is no award in suffering, put yourself first, because no one else will.

Dear woman,

Don’t be deceived into thinking you have to go to the depths of hell to be worthy of love.

Dear woman,

Stand up for yourself, even if everyone is against you.

Dear woman,

I am sorry that society has continued to fail you. I am sorry that you have to be killed, bullied, abused just for rejecting a man’s advances. You deserve better and that you shall get.


Let it go

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I have come to learn that in life, it is much better to let go of the past and everything it came with. There is no point in holding grudges. Also learn that whatever someone else does is their issue to deal with, not yours.

Never place too much importance to what others might say or think of you. People will talk regardless of what you do, so the best thing would be to keep doing you the best way you know how to. A friend once said to me, “opinions are not facts”, also that “someone else’s opinion of you doesn’t define who you are.” That was me two years ago, I cared a little too much what others thought of me, and I let it get to me. Now, I’m grateful that I’ve come past all that irrelevant nonsense. I’ve come to learn that letting someone else measure your self-worth is equivalent to self-destruction.

No matter what you may do in your life, never let another mortal define who you are, or let them tell you the type of person you should be. You, and only you, have the power to measure your self-worth, and only you have the key to your destiny.

Another great thing I learned is letting go of the negativity in your life. Nothing is comparable to the feeling you get when you move past all the pettiness, and irrelevant things you once had in your life. The keyword for today would be to “LET GO”. Don’t hold things within you, free it all from your heart, because the minute you start withholding grudges, you’re paving a way for negative thoughts to creep into your mind and heart.

Never let anyone push you to the extent of losing your path and becoming someone you won’t be proud of. Navigate your life the way you want it, take control of yourself, talk to God for guidance. Believe me, if you do all of the above, nothing and no one would be able to stand in your path.

Make no mistake about it, life is an obstacle course full of never-ending challenges, but that doesn’t mean you should lay down and let it creep in, pull up your GODDAMN pants and show that b***h that you’re ready for whatever it is going to throw at you. Stand your ground and never give up!!!!!

However, in conquering the world and fighting this disease, NEVER look down on others, NEVER step on others to get ahead, and ALWAYS be cautious because whatever you do to your fellow man, best believe that same thing or worse would be done to you.

Love and believe in yourself. Trust God to guide you to the right path!! If you have all three, then nothing or no one is beyond your reach. Aim for the sky, and reach for the stars.

Teeda is a social introvert looking to share her experiences with the world